Do you still have your period?
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
