bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
