Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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