he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
