I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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