I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
