Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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