Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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