For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
