check it out our google latitudes are spooning
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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