WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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