we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
