he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I will pee on everything he values.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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