but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
