I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
