I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
