id be glad to
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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