I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
