White coat. Heels.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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