You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
