For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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