I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
