batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
