Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
