Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
We have so much sex to catch up on
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
