I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
