my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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