Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
