can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
