Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize