If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize