Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
