Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
