So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
