If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
