sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
