just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
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