his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
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