i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I got inside last night via doggy door
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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