dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
