Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
