i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Randomize
