i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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