absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
