"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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