Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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