Define "chronic" masturbator.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
