It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
