you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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