just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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